Tuesday, 5 December 2017

Goodbye old buddy, and happy trails

Yesterday, our dear old Billy Big Balls (aka Comet) eased off his mortal coil and went to the eternal rutting grounds in the sky.  It's a time of sadness and reflection.  While the reality is that all living things eventually die, some of our animals make more of an impact than others - and bulls are long-lived and lone, holding a special place on a farm. So we are off into the unknown for a while, with artificial insemination and all that may entail.


Remembering younger days, when he was a mighty beast.  Goodbye old buddy, and happy trails.


Monday, 20 November 2017

Mizzle, mizzle, mizzle



Yup, it’s raining again down here in the south-west.  I know it keeps things green, but that would still be the case with a quarter of the water and I fear that the only way I am going to get the lawn under control is with a flamethrower and a dose of Round Up, followed by several tonnes of concrete.  Today the cows decided that they are in for the winter...the sheds have been open for them for a week or so, and they have been wandering in and out…but they seem to be fed up with the weather too.  There is an upside, though – some spectacular sunrises, with colour-washed clouds resembling the roiling surface of Jupiter.

Animals are on the move – fat lambs to the place that shall not be named, spring calvers over to Farmer Rob, followed by early lambing ewes.  We’ll have the two vet students with us this year, so lambing has been brought forwards…starting over there mid-March and with us towards the end of the month.  And old Billy Big Balls (aka Comet) will take his final curtain call sometime soon, as is the nature of these things.

Vast flocks of starlings have taken over the fields during the day, and fieldfares and redwings are back raiding the berries.  The usual suspects hang around the house, and we had a great spotted woodpecker checking out our rockery tree moots recently.  Leaving seed heads on the flowers has encouraged goldfinches, blue tits and sparrows to hang precariously outside the window – it’s amazing how unaware of us they can be sometimes.  Or perhaps we just don’t look that scary.

Ned the Nipper is growing fast, and a lovely character…but yet to learn anything of any importance.  My attempts at training have led to him simply sitting and staring at me.  He is quite well behaved, despite this stubborn streak.  We’ve almost made it through the house-training stage…almost.

Ned is ambitious, to say the least...
Meanwhile, Cody has taken up drinking to cope.

I am the Wicked Wolf.
Someone else has just turned 40, and our lovely friend Cathy made him a birthday cake - not bad for her first try at decorating one!  Happy Birthday Farmer Ian.


Thursday, 26 October 2017

Ann's Diary 3


While we went away to Kefalonia for a week, woken daily by the gentle tinkling of goat bells on the hillside, Ann held the fort, with an incontinent geriatric Joey and widdling nipper Ned.  Ann in charge?  We all know what that means…another instalment of Ann’s Diary!

Day 1 Saturday
Your lovely clean house was wrecked by 3pm.  Played fetch with Ned for a while, who promptly peed on the floor when he got in. You said to leave Joey behind on the evening walk, but how?  He trotted most of the way and even barked on half a lap of 7-Acres. He ambled behind for the other half.  Late back from my evening out to find Ned’s racoon completely disembowelled.

Day 2 Sunday
Paid the price for going out.  Two alarm calls from Cody at 2:15 and 3:30, but all good as there were no heaps (or otherwise) to clear up in the morning. A beautiful day and all went well until I got to Ball Allotments.  One of the rams seemed to have a shoulder injury and was playing dead until I got near, then hobbled away. Joey spent a lot of time in the garden with me and Alan, then came in to poo on the runner.  I fear it may need a dry clean!

Day 3 Monday
Well, everyone slept like tops last night, me too until I heard the wind rising. I spoke to dad this morning and he is going to bring the teaser ram from home to go in with the tudduths. He brought calf muesli and we went up to Ball to look at the lame ram in case he needs replacing – still lame, but ‘working’ so I think he’d been fighting.  I now have the Landover for a couple of days as we did a car swap so Kat has something to drive when she is over from Sardinia.  Hurricane Ophelia has been gusting all day, but not too dramatic. We had a really amazing orange sun and strange light for a while…it turned out to be Saharan dust picked up by the winds. One of the cows in Edwin’s was behaving very spookily when I drove around them.  Feeling a bit concerned, as she should not have reacted to the bike, I took dad for a look – we decided to start them on some wedges of straw. No accidents from the dogs today, but I did lose Cody for a short while – found him in the pond having a cool down.  Question: how much water does a husky fleece hold?  Answer: enough to flood the utility room floor, as I was not quick enough to stop him running indoors.

Day 4 Tuesday
Red kite at lunchtime.  All good today, although the Welsh Black is still keeping an eye on me.  Joey has had morning and evening walks so far, on the lead on the way out, then free-trotting on the way back – just like a pony when you turn it to home.

Day 5 Wednesday
The black cow ate straw this morning, so all fine.  Ned has been good(ish) – the runner, however, is getting a few wees…even when he has just come in from outside.

Day 6 Thursday
I fed the calves and cows before nipping into town for a coffee and some shopping.  I managed to get all the rest done before the rain set in.  Dad bought cake, and also checked Common and Ball Allotments for me as they had been fog-bound in the morning.  Another casualty – the ancient piece of blue string on the quad bike keys!  I have replaced it with a bright orange shoelace just in case they are dropped in the straw.  Dad says he hopes a rat doesn’t run off with them…now I am worried.

Day 7 Friday
Not a great night – very wet and windy.  Joey had the gallopers so he asked to go out a couple of times.  I lost Cody and just before I got dressed and went out to find him, I saw him looking through the front windows to come in – the side gate had blown down.  All good outside.  The ram is walking around again, but I am not sure how much he is working – though he was in hot pursuit when I saw him.  5-Acres was looking bare and I moved the sheep on, especially with Storm Brian arriving tonight.  Tried to get a photo of Ned and Cody playing, but they stopped as soon as I got my phone out.  Just at the moment, there is a wren picking flies out of the window frames.  I have seen several rats today – quite young ones.

Day 8 Saturday

We all overslept, but managed to get our walk done before any rain arrived.  Joey wasn’t keen this morning.  I have been hand-feeding him to get him to eat – sorry!  Much squealing…more rats – time for the air rifle.  All good outside.  I spent an hour trying to make the house look as though the dogs had been at the kennels all week.  Hopefully, it won’t look too bad by the time you get back in the small hours.

Monday, 9 October 2017

Goodbyes and hellos

Blue skies, happy cattle, the moon and Sonny.

It’s not the same once the swallows have gone.  Not long ago they were chasing each other around the house, chittering with excitement and keeping the insect population in check.  Our gang flew south and were temporarily replaced by fellow travellers from the north, but now my swallow wire is empty and it’s time to clean the crap off of the walls.

However, nature always provides a new distraction…in fact, several.  The stags are getting a bit frisky and we can now hear their ghostly moaning some nights.  Dad’s telescope is coming in very handy for remote-spotting.  At our latest pub quiz, Ann excitedly reported that she had seen a barn owl at our Cross, and lo and behold it flew over my head when I turned into our drive as I came home.  Imagine my surprise the next morning when I found it sheltering under our porch, lifting off on silent wings to glide away gracefully across the valley.  You are welcome back to eat our vermin any night.  An hour later, I disturbed a snipe in the field just below the house…an exciting day.

Farmer Ian was looking after his dad’s place for the weekend, so I was left in charge.  Saturday was a real stinker for weather – Sonny and I got drenched.  Ian had bought me new leggings, but while labelled as large, they were clearly designed for someone a lot taller and wider than me…so I waddled around with the cuffs turned up (which filled with water) and three inches of the waist tucked into my jeans.  Fortunately, I did not come across anyone on my travels.

The teaser rams are in and performing their services.  Their vasectomised role is to get the ladies ready and receptive to the amorous advances of the rams with functioning equipment.  A plum job I would imagine for some – lots of sex and no child maintenance.  Not that the other rams do much different, I suppose.  I’ve also come across some very sleepy sheepy in the fields – several times I’ve had to drive up to a “corpse” and shout to get a very startled sheep to wake up and smell the hay.  And of course there is the occasional animal with its head stuck in the fence that needs a wiggle to get it out.

The Sunday was glorious, and a reward for not getting too grumpy the day before.  The mist hung in the valleys, while the hilltops were in blazing sunshine.  I felt a bit sun-struck by the end of the day, having engineered being outside most of it (and helping Ian do hooves – always hooves – when he got back).

Looking across Devon.  Autumn is beautiful...and so is Mrs Cow.

We’ve also been cutting logs as “Winter is coming”.  My dad is probably very excited seeing these pictures.  I’ve never met anyone so log obsessed as him - he would bring huge branches home from outings to the woods.

Love the chainsaw!
That should keep us going for a bit.

We also had an unexpected visitor in the garden...Bonnie helped us keep the clover down when Innes popped in for a cuppa.  Might borrow her more often for grass control...

Ian keeps Bonnie out of the flowerbeds.
The biggest hello has to be reserved for the new man in my life.  Neddy arrived just over a week ago from the neighbouring farm, and I am completely smitten.  He has fitted in (although the other dogs might disagree and just refer to him as “the little shite who keeps nipping my ankles”), and adores Sonny.  He seems very bright, and has a stubborn streak in him that will be interesting to deal with as it develops.  He’s already met cows, sheep and a horse, and while cautious, is not fearful…which is what you need in a sheepdog.  The house is a mess, and Ned thinks that the log basket is simply full of toys to be taken around the house and stripped of bark.  The indoor plants are for shredding, and Joey’s bed needs a thorough killing and disembowelling.  I made the mistake of putting down a new roll of kitchen tissue (on its spike) while I mopped up a little accident…and he Andrexed the whole thing across the room.  That’s my boy!

Ned with Sonny; Cody is not really impressed; Neddy poses; exhausted; and totally hyper - get off the bloody sofa!
Ned becomes more dog-like in the week between two photos: with Jos, then with Hannah; Joey is resigned; and finally, a minute of peace...
...until he's back in your face again!

Wednesday, 23 August 2017

Wednesday, 2 August 2017

A week on the farm


Recently Ian M went to Sardinia to meet his new nephew Sebastiano, and left me in charge of all things farmy.  As Ann does, I write a diary to bring him up-to-speed on his return...


Tuesday

The sheep in Cleave want to move and are hanging around by the gate - will shift tomorrow. Gave a magnesium bucket to the cattle Below The Farmhouse and a salt lick to the Quarryfield lambs...there are some shitty backsides on the rich grass, but no maggots.  A ram in Little Field had a scrape on his back that was attracting flies - wrestled him to the ground, got covered in crap, and blue-sprayed him.  If the flies persist, I will spray properly.  Did a limpy lamb (pre-foot rot) in Raceground - blue spray, blue dot on neck to ID him, and 3cc Alamycin.  Got to Common to find only 17 cattle instead of 18 - finally located the missing calf haring about in the field below (Ball Allotments East) and faffed about for a while trying to get him back over the hedge.  Tied up the hole. Cody killed a pheasant in 7 acres...why do they fly right into him?  Young and stupid, I guess.  Have started feeding the Quarryfield lambs twice a day now, half each time, as they seem to need a reminder to go over to the troughs and the rain is ruining the cake if left too long.  Caught the black-faced limpy lamb - there is nothing obviously wrong, so sprayed his hoofs and 3cc.  Blue dot on neck. All in all, a quiet first day...

Wednesday

Moved singles from Cleave to Gratton - much happier now.  Billy Big Balls had a small sore patch on his back attracting flies - what is it with the boys, first the ram, now the bull?  Needless to say, did NOT wrestle him to the ground. Snuck up on his blind side as he was gazing into the distance, sprayed and ran.  Two rams had bloody heads where they were fighting, and it's not even tupping time - gave them a talking to, but could not get close enough to spray.  Sod them.  Low cloud on Common, so it took me ages to find the cattle as I had no idea where I was in the field most of the time (Sonny loved it).  The sheep got short shrift.

Thursday

Cody killed another pheasant...ditto to Tuesday.  Pity they are young, otherwise that could've been dinner. Blue sprayed the bull again. Brought in a scouring and pathetic lamb from Edwin's (the one that has always been pathetic), shaved his bum, drenched and sprayed, then took back out. Lost my anti-insect goggles somewhere...probably Edwin's.  Raceground needs topping.  Lanes smell of honeysuckle and meadowsweet on the way up the hill.  Sonny is missing you, but we helped Richard and Andrew move some sheep as Dan is now too old to control them properly and Trev too young (he was so excited).  A bunch of wayward ewes started off down the wrong road and Sonny retrieved them perfectly - I think he was showing off to his captive audience.  Counted 42 sparrows and 3 baby bunnies in the garden.

Friday

Absolutely drek day, but managed to get the stock done before the major downpours (although still got very wet).  The baby swallows were sheltering on the window sills.  Moved the Below The Farmhouse cattle to Over The Road - as there were no animals in sight, I stood at the gate and called, and they soon crested the ridge at full gallop.  If only there had been someone there to see it - very impressive stock control!  Moved Edwin's hogs and ewe lambs to Below The Farmhouse - lamb from yesterday was still pathetic, so I carried him and parked him under the hedge.  Not sure he will make it.  Didn't find my insect-goggles.  Did foot and injection for the lamb we treated before in Ball Allotments West as he had a maggotty hoof - he was hard to catch, and I fell on my arse again.  The heather is flowering along the top road, and it was so windy at Common that the buzzards were riding the gusts to hover above the field.


Saturday

Ungrateful lamb died.  Sprayed a handful of lamb hooves in Quarryfield, but no injection as nothing obviously wrong - probably strip.  Another foot-rot lamb in Raceground - and yes, I slipped over again on the wet grass and sprained something.  I'll live.  Weather ok this morning, but storms predicted for later.  Huge rat in the flowerbed when I got home!

Sunday

Got absolutely drenched - Sonny loved it.  Moved sheep on from Gratton to 13 Acres, and they were very happy to be munching fresh grass - I think we spoil them.  Got a lamb's head out of the wire where it was stuck.  Put all of the Gratton buckets into 13 acres so no-one has any excuses to get mineral deficiency.  In the afternoon I brought up a Quarryfield shitty lamb for drenching, feet and a proper spray.  I have blue hands again.

Monday

There is a half-blind ewe in 13 Acres (black-face), but needless to say we'll need to get them in to treat her as she is too fast for me.  Your pregnant cow has STILL not done anything - udders have not even begun to bag up.  Spent the afternoon clearing up the top yard.

Tuesday

Common and Raceground need buckets when you are back (we have run out).  The ewes are ready for weaning as they are kicking away their lambs. A ewe and her twins belonging to Andrew are in Allotments West - I've informed him.  Other than that, we're set for a hand-over back.